Jane Austen
I watched yet another documentary on PBS tonight (yes, it happens to be my favourite channel). The documentary was called "Jane Austen Regrets". It tells the tale of Austen's supposed regrets in her life. Since all of Austen's novels are about love, passion, inheritance and marriage, and Austen never married, it leaves one to wonder if the lack of a spouse was her main regret. Was she lonely, did she regret not loving, marrying and having children?
She had her only marriage proposal at age 27. She accepted, but withdrew her acceptance a day later. Why? The documentary suggests that it was due partly to her older sister, who helped her realize that marriage would effectively ruin her chances to write. The documentary suggests that she did not regret it - she viewed not having married as having the freedom to do as she had, ie, write. She also advised her niece never to marry a man she did not love for "Anything is to be preferred or endured rather than marrying without Affection".
She had her only marriage proposal at age 27. She accepted, but withdrew her acceptance a day later. Why? The documentary suggests that it was due partly to her older sister, who helped her realize that marriage would effectively ruin her chances to write. The documentary suggests that she did not regret it - she viewed not having married as having the freedom to do as she had, ie, write. She also advised her niece never to marry a man she did not love for "Anything is to be preferred or endured rather than marrying without Affection".
Not that she did not know love. Apparently, when she was 21, she fell in love with a young man. They spent much time together until the young man's family intervened, and sent him away. Austen never saw the young man again. Marriage between the two was not possible anyway since neither had money.
I could not help but see parallels between the Victorian notions of love, marriage and money and present day South Asian perceptions of the same. Both are fascinated with romance, love, money and in the culmination of marriage. I would suggest one watch a typical Bollywood movie to see if I am right or not!
All ends well with a happy marriage. You won't believe how many women out there buy into this silly notion. If they do not marry, they believe that they have lost out on something immensely beautiful. And they live out the rest of their lives in bitterness, which is why we have such a negative opinion of unmarried women, even to this day and age. More so in the South Asian community.
So kudos to Austen! She has left behind a legacy no married Victorian woman ever did.
Her words live on, and so does she.
posted by LogicGirl at
2:08 AM
5 Comments:
But perhaps Austen did wish she married, how would one truly know? Most of her personal writings (journals and diaries) and letters were burnt after she died, which leaves us with nothing but speculation on what she may or may not have regreted in her life.
If one meets someone suitable, being in a state of marriage is surely better than being without?
Mariage is not indispensable to one's life; but sharing love with another is.
Yes. Contrast that with the practical Charlotte in Pride and Prejudice.
"'I am not romantic, you know. I never was. I ask only a comfortable home; and considering Mr. Collins's character, connections, and situation in life, I am convinced that my chance of happiness with him is as fair as most people can boast on entering the marriage state.'"
Charlotte Lucas to Lizzy, after her engagement to Mr. Collins
Pride and Prejudice, volume 1, chapter 22
"' . . . it is better to know as little as possible of the defects of the person with whom you are to pass your life.'"
Charlotte Lucas to Lizzy
Pride and Prejudice, volume 1, chapter 6
A woman can share her love with others, like her family and her friends, if she does not meet a suitable man in her life. Rather like the way Jane lived her life.
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